What up Z,
I respect your integrity with the way y'all run DJBooth. Most people see opinions and perspectives and naturally think they're negative rather than learning. I've personally learned a lot from being told no. It's a great thing to see people stand by what they believe in and create a space for it. Also, keep on them n*ggas necks that abuse women. STAY on they neck, please. Kids need to know that shit is not okay and a lot of us didn't grow up with fathers to tell us that. I'm blessed mine came back to me later in life and helped shape my thought process of how to be a real man.
I've been running through these thoughts all my life. Should I stand tall or move like everyone else? I mean, I used to stay next door to a damn crack house. I chose drawing pictures instead and trying to skateboard and shit. But I would be lying if I told you this route of "honor" ain't the hardest shit I've done.
I've been rapping for 10 years, been told by plenty to stop and that I won't succeed. Most wish the best for me but don't understand how to say it. I look for the sun in the cloudy days all the time. But recently, man, shit has gotten a lil crazy. I've been questioning all the time I spent chasing this dream. I've done a lot and been put in positions I know dudes who'll literally kill to be in my spot. I've actually had someone leave me for dead. Literally and figuratively. I've seen evil in people. But I've remained strong and kept the faith because this world ain't real anyway. So why should I allow it to tear me down? But at the same time, I'm only human.
People always ask me what makes me stand out from other people and musicians. I never really knew the answers until today. I've been homeless and still recorded a full project, I've had to walk hours on hours to get to the studio after working 12 hours. I don't know why I pushed myself so hard, man. But I do know with everything I've seen and been through, I NEVER want anyone else to go through it. I do not want to be the source of people's pain. I avoid that as much as possible even if it puts me in a bad position, but that shit just not cool man. I've felt enough pain to know nobody else should or have to go through the same. So I rap about it, hoping I can make some type of change.
Fun fact: "Alright" by Kendrick Lamar saved my life. I remember walking around, trying to find a place to take a nap and that song came on. I just cried, bro, just walked and cried. I knew I was going to be alright. No bullshit. But enough about me and my sad ass stories.
I just want you to know, man to man, I respect what y'all build. I don't know where I'm going to be five years from now—hopefully, a megastar—but y'all won't go anywhere. We need people like y'all, believe it or not. Sorry for the long ass message, man. I'm walking, clearing my mind.
If you read this all the way through or not, this helped me.
Jamie Hancock is a rap artist from Houston, TX. Want to send a letter to our editors? Email firstname.lastname@example.org.