Karma's a B*tch: 50 Cent is Now Jimmy Iovine's Young Buck

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For those who somehow missed yesterday's

"Girls Gone Wild" travachamockery

, things are not going well for

50 Cent

musically. He's actually a legit role model when it comes

to philanthropy

, but his music and business projects have been shakier than an Atlanta stripper's ass. Part of that is simply due to Fiddy making shitty music, and part of it is due to his disintegrating relationship with

Interscope Records



head honcho Jimmy Iovine.

As I started to look at 50's increasingly fucked situation at Interscope I was reminded of this other rapper who was also having a problem with the head of his label. Hmmm....now who could that be?

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The Background

: Eminem and Dr. Dre bring 50 Cent into the Jimmy Iovine's


family. 50 proceeds to drop two multi-platinum albums, "Get Rich or Die Trying" and "The Massacre", convincing Iovine to give him his own label,


, in the process. Everyone's making money, everyone's happy.

The Beef:

: 50's music sales power begins to falter as "Curtis" does poorly by Fiddy's previously astronomical standards and "Before I Self Destruct" does poorly by anyone's standards. Suddenly Iovine's not so interested in putting up with 50's aggressive style and


ceases to make him a priority.

50 grows increasingly angry but there's not much he can do. He's contractually obligated to deliver five albums to


before he can sign to another label, and Iovine's ultimately the only one who can decide when that album is released (if at all). In other words, 50's fucked.

The Current Status

: Iovine doesn't really give a fuck. He's making huge money off Beats By Dre (ironically Dre helped bring 50 to


and now he's indirectly helping keep him there) and other


acts like Eminem are moving huge numbers. He's not particularly convinced a new 50 album's going to make much money so he's perfectly comfortable sitting back and seeing how it plays out. Meanwhile 50

gets increasingly frustrated/crazy


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The Background

: Looking to expand his


empire by bringing on some new blood, 50 Cent signs Young Buck to a multi-album deal and brings him into the G-Unit fold. Buck's first two albums, "Straight Outta Cashville" and "Buck the World" sell well, especially "Cashville", which goes platinum. Everyone's making money, everyone's happy.

The Beef

: After Young Buck's sales power faltered and he became a pain in the ass on a personal/business level 50 stops including him in G-Unit collaborative efforts and stops promoting his solo work. However, Buck's contractually obligated to put out three albums with


before he can sign with another label.

In other words, Buck's fucked. He can't leave


until he puts out an official third album, and 50 refuses to put out his official third album. The only way out is to convince 50 to either put out the album or release him from the contract.

The Current Status

: 50 doesn't give a fuck. He's not convinced he'll make any money from a new Young Buck album and he's making plenty of money otherwise. So he's fine with sitting back while Buck alternately flips between trying to complain his way out of the deal and playing nice with 50 to get him to cancel the contract.

The similarities really are striking and yes, you're right. That means 50 Cent is Jimmy Iovine's Young Buck. (Think it over, it actually makes sense.) At this rate we're about six months from Jimmy putting out a recorded phone call of 50 crying.



Jimmy Iovine knows how this will all end, but in the meantime I have an honest recommendation for 50. Just release Young Buck from his contract. Nothing else seems to be working and you could really use the good karma.