Here at RefinedHype we pride ourselves on going where other journalists (like Huffington Post or CNN) are too scared too. Anyone can write about what is going on with the health care crisis or the Middle East, but it takes a real set of journalistic stones to look into things like r
appers saying shit before they rap
or
Kanye West fighting with street signs
. In yet another harrowing example of journalistic integrity and mettle, RefinedHype will now break another huge story with an
absurdly detailed investigation into rapper poses
. Pulitzer anyone?
For all you up-and-coming emcees out there who practice their flow and wordplay everyday, you are doing it wrong. The real key to being a successful rapper is finding a signature pose that makes you look good for the camera. If you don’t have a good pose, like the ones below, then nobody will take you seriously. It might be mean but it’s the facts. Think Outkast or KRS got where they are by rapping? Wrong, it is all about how you look. So lets dig right in.
The Hands Towards the Camera pose:
Rappers holding their hands out to the camera seems to be a popular pose for purveyors of the prose. It makes the person at home feel like they are right there and adds some artsy range and depth to your photos. Hands to the camera is always a good choice.
The King of this pose looks to be Eminem. He has mastered the art of looking tough yet pensive and drawing you in with his hands. He even added his own spice to it, doing this thing were he reaches out to the camera, somewhat resembling a stereotypical Shakespearean actor reciting lines; like if Romeo’s hands fell asleep. See below, and
and
.
Either he is a posing genius, or just really likes
.
The Point at the Camera Pose:
Please, don’t make the rookie mistake and confuse hands to the camera and
pointing to
the camera. Hands to the camera is more welcoming and approachable, but pointing to the camera gives of that serious vibe. Pointing demands you pay respect—it commands your attention—whereas hand to the camera is a little more pensive and engaging.
Don’t forget the
; dangerous yet when done correctly all the more effectivem, and y
ou don’t even have to point a the camera either; perhaps you are pointing to another person in the picture as an assist. Just in case everyone can’t see the other person. Or maybe it’s a sign of humility, like “This is the most important person on this picture”:
Ultimately though, any pointing pose question should be directed to 50 Cent, who’s rocked the point for well over a decade now as his go to post. See below, and
,
and
.
The Fake Gun Pose:
Hands are good for pointing, but they are also good for making fake guns (looking at you Rick Ross,
). Below and
.
He even uses real guns too! And shoes!
Sidenote: what the hell does this mean? Is he trying to kill himself and his shoes? Don’t do it Ross, your shoes have so much to live for!
The Deuces
After all that gun talk its time to finally bring some piece back into the world with some peace signs. Below and
.
The angle of the peace sign is very important. If it is sideways, it is more like a peace out thing, but an upright deuce obviously means peace, as in world peace.
. Kendrick has more attitude solely because his piece sign is totally horizontal and and Em has a 45 degree angle. You gotta think Em wanted to go with a Point at the Camera, but then saw Kendrick’s deuces and decided to switch it up.
The Hold Mah Chainnnnnn Pose
Hands aren’t the only prop rappers are known to use. Rappers are known to accentuate their jewelry, you know, in case you somehow missed their comically large, gawdy chains. Below, and
,
and
.
I wonder
?
The Rappers With Cute Animals Pose
Because rappers with cute animals. Below and
,
,
and
.
Okay this is getting ridiculous. There are still plenty more to talk about like the
,
, the
“oh you are taking a picture? I didn’t even realize”
, and of course
, soaking all the glory of an adoring public, but I don’t want to overwhelm you. Bottom line is, rappers pose a lot, and a proper pose can make or break your career. This just goes to show that every rapper should have a posing choreographer in their team. It doesn’t matter what your music sounds like, if you look good posing you are set. In fact, I think I might quit RefnedHype and become hip-hop’s first posing coach. See you in the tabloids y’all.
P.S.- My google search history just looks absurd right now.