50 Cent has been in the headlines all year, but none of those headlines have had anything to do with his own music career. On Friday, the rap veteran changed up that narrative, delivering "Still Think I'm Nothing," a new single featuring frequent collaborator Jeremih.
In an Instagram post celebrating the song's release, 50 Cent wrote, "I'm back in my bag." Unfortunately, that bag isn't as comfortable as 50 probably think's it is.
Below is a transcript of our entire staff reacting to 50 Cent's new single on Slack. You'll want to keep an open mind—we didn't.
Z: Guys, 50 Cent dropped a new single with Jeremih... thoughts?
Brendan: I don’t even think I’d care enough to click on a new 50 cent song reaction piece.
Andy: How old do you think the song is? Do I have to log-in to Rhapsody to hear it? [Editor's Note: In an interview with Rap-Up, the song's producer, Bongo ByTheWay, revealed he's been sitting on the record "for a little while."]
Donna: Realistically, Jeremih makes this song.
Hershal: You have to download the song on ZShare and then open it up in Winamp, Andy.
Sermon: Jeremih's hook is one of the best I've heard in a long time.
Brendan: Find you someone who looks at you the way Sermon looks at 2017 G-Unit songs.
Donna: We should all be so lucky.
Sermon: *Throws Spider Loc hat on*
Dylan: 50 sounds like he's trying very hard to catch up.
Sermon: In what sense?
Hershal: I'm mostly just confused by the song. It's not a radio record and it's not a club record... it's kinda like an album deep cut.
Z: I know this might be a not-so-bold statement, but this is probably the best 50 Cent song in a minute and by minute, I mean years.
Dylan: Sermon, I have no strong feelings about the record one way or another other than Jeremih killing this hook.
Donna: I agree, I would buy an EP of Jeremih hooks. This song would be completely naked without his voice.
Hershal: The Jeremih hook is great. Particularly since it's juxtaposed against the bare bones production during the verses.
Donna: This song just made me a bigger Jeremih fan, which I take as a net positive.
Sermon: It's the perfect 50 cent beat, though.
Z: Can't wait for the "Sermon must be on G-Unit's payroll" comments.
Brendan: So, I just went to 50's Twitter and he retweeted this People magazine slideshow about eight sexy men that are still single. He's not even on the list.
Matt: Does someone have the link? I want to chime in.
Brendan: “This video is no longer available due to a copyright claim by Curtis Jackson.” Sounds like 50 doesn’t like this song.
Sermon: I've listened to this song at least seven times since last night. I'm genuinely excited about 50's new album.
Matt: Because I can't listen to it, I'm going to give my imagined feedback. *Clears throat* I really felt as though 50 tapped into a certain existential crisis of whether he truly is something or, dare we say it, nothing. He believes in the former while he stands conflicted with those that believe in the latter. It's 50 Cent versus the world now, and in this Great War to come, he's brought Jeremih alongside him like King Arthur's sword. It's 50 Cent at his most exuberant, yet his most reserved tonally. If we were to ever think he was nothing before, he makes sure we are sorely mistaken.
Andy: I didn't know you wrote for Noisey.